My Perfect Ass..

My perfect ass...

..oops sorry, that should read,

Perfect? My Ass!

One of the more irritating New Age platitudes is that everything is perfect as it is. You've got no money, your back aches, your job sucks and some bald bloke in an orange robe explains that "this is the perfect experience, simply because it is the one you are having right now." If you can hear him above the whale music he will go on to explain that the pain in your neck is from a past life hanging and your chronic flatulence has something to do with karma.

I know this is irritating because I've both heard it and said it on numerous occasions. Even more irritating was the time Tracy caught me out using one of those New Age truisms and hit me with the debilitating counter-punch "that's true, but not when you say it!"

That is a powerful phrase. That's true but not when you say it. So many messages lose their authenticity when delivered from the wrong place. So when the wrong person tells you all is perfect, to respond "Perfect? My ass" is perfectly reasonable. Try punching the person on the nose and see if they still think everything is perfect. If it is, then listen to everything he says.

The annoying fact is that everything is perfect as it is. I may not like it, which is a different thing entirely, but in any given moment I am the perfect expression of all the information available to me.

There is a continual flow of universal energy which, against its better judgement, has decided to express through me. On the occasions I am able to remove myself and my opinions sufficiently from that expression, I usually find life flows with ease in an unfolding saga of surprise and delight. This universal energy seems to know what its doing!.

But that would be dull. Who wants to watch a film where it's all wonderful and there are no obstacles to overcome and nothing bad ever happens? How can you be a hero in that scenario?

So universal energy decided to liven things up a bit and gave me an opinion and the illusion of free will. Obviously I have a much better idea than infinite universal knowledge of what it is I really want and how I want to experience this experience, and so begins the most imbalanced arm wrestle imaginable.

Bill Ayling vs the Universe.*

My opposition to what is, my determination to organise the universe around my opinions, my insistence on being right leaves me battered and bruised until I retreat and call a cease fire. As my resistance weakens things start to feel a little easier. My energy returns and you now what?.. things are not so bad. I must be doing something right and I like the feeling of power that brings. When my source of information is the infinite field of possibility (which is the universe) things feel kind of cool. But....

...I forget it was my surrender which delivered the results and get to work with my new found power. Organising, shaping, moulding the world and people into my own version of Utopia. My version of perfect. That vision comes not from the infinite field of possibility but from the relatively limited and unquestionably finite field of Bill Ayling's mind. A reservoir of experiences to be avoided or repeated based on a judgement system inherited from a similarly limited field of possibility (no offense Mum and Dad).

But as I attempt to craft my own version of perfect things get tricky. People don't follow the script, circumstances are difficult to hold in just the right configuration and even when you get all of those ducks lined up in the optimal space, some or other shit happens. It's exhausting organising a universe and the universe knows that. So in its benevolence the universe lets me know when I am getting in its way, obstructing its flow so to speak. It does this through the medium of pain (physical,emotional or mental...take your choice).

No matter how hard I try to wrestle the universe into submission it never moves. This is because it loves me so much it will always work to guide me back to my true power. That power is as an expression of the infinite. The more I surrender to its will the more strength I have. Instead of exhausting myself wrestling an immoveable force, that force flows through me. 

So when everything feels crappy it is perfect in that it is a reflection of the source of my information. It is an indication that I am referencing the data banks of Bill Ayling's list of how it should be as opposed to the universal library's presentation of how it is. 

Who knows I may even get to like the universes' idea of Bill Ayling. I think I will give it a go!

love

Bill

 * I chose arm wrestling as opposed to mud wrestling as a kindness to the clairvoyant or visually oriented readers.